im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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