Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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