I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
3pm strippers are depressing
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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