These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
it's like heaven, but drunker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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