We're like a lot better than the average bears
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
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