ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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