last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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