youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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