If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
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