i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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