Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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