Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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