The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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