Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
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