Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
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Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
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Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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