God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize