just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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