I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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