btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
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I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
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