great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize