She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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