If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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