saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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