new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
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An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
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They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
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