I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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