Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize