Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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