I skipped work to stalk him.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
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she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
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I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
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