I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
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