i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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