Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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