Texts From Last Night

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  (917): View more from New York City

  Eric got herpes from Jo-ann

  (914): View more from New York

  That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian

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  (917): Eric got herpes from Jo-ann (914): That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian http://tfl.nu/xico
  Replies (48) Good night (644) Bad night (2681)
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  (949): View more from California

  if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics

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  (949): if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics http://tfl.nu/rqml
  Replies (14) Good night (1008) Bad night (1684) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory

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  (516): I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory http://tfl.nu/t9t2
  Replies (21) Good night (10883) Bad night (646) Order T-Shirt
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.

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  (636): I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap. http://tfl.nu/1yuw
  Replies (56) Good night (1010) Bad night (3156) Order T-Shirt
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick

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  (508): I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick http://tfl.nu/wbrv
  Replies (38) Good night (5244) Bad night (1721) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?

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  (612): how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight? http://tfl.nu/54td
  Replies (13) Good night (3692) Bad night (928) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.

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  (513): sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces. http://tfl.nu/5w4e
  Replies (16) Good night (6740) Bad night (767) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers

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  (512): She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers http://tfl.nu/jy5e
  Replies (11) Good night (1851) Bad night (3335) Order T-Shirt
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.

  (586): View more from Michigan

  You raise a valid concern

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  (734): Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point. (586): You raise a valid concern http://tfl.nu/k6mm
  Replies (6) Good night (1925) Bad night (2936)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.

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  (678): we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole. http://tfl.nu/qa53
  Replies (9) Good night (2546) Bad night (882) Order T-Shirt
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?

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  (973): You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you? http://tfl.nu/qnfr
  Replies (3) Good night (1373) Bad night (483) Order T-Shirt
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.

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  (773): I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again. http://tfl.nu/53df
  Replies (6) Good night (1670) Bad night (470) Order T-Shirt
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.

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  (316): Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip. http://tfl.nu/kzaf
  Replies (2) Good night (1782) Bad night (407) Order T-Shirt
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.

  (1-832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Totally acceptable.

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  (832): I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro. (1-832): Totally acceptable. http://tfl.nu/y2av
  Replies (7) Good night (2061) Bad night (378) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious

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  (914): Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious http://tfl.nu/b9mo
  Replies (5) Good night (675) Bad night (397) Order T-Shirt

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