My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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