She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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