so let's talk penis.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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