With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
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