I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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