Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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