Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
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