is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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