This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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