the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize