I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
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