I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
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