I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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