guys are not supposed to queef...right?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
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