Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize