It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
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