do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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