I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
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